


Quiet

by Meowser_Clancy



Series: Madney Moments [14]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: F/M, proposal, ring fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:48:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24392314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meowser_Clancy/pseuds/Meowser_Clancy
Summary: "Maddie, you lived almost two decades with Doug," Josh said softly. "It's going to take a lot more time before you've healed. In the meantime, know that Chimney won't ask you for anything before you're ready." When Maddie finds a ring in Chimney's things, she can't help but panic.
Relationships: Maddie Buckley/Howie "Chimney" Han
Series: Madney Moments [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1748338
Comments: 5
Kudos: 16





	Quiet

**Author's Note:**

  * For [maddiebuckleys](https://archiveofourown.org/users/maddiebuckleys/gifts).



It was only Maddie's second trimester but they'd already moved in together. It only made sense; they planned on parenting together so that meant living in the same place. They'd found a condo not too far from work, something that was large enough to give them both space, but not the full commitment of a house. Maddie wondered if they were both holding back, both still staying cautious. Life didn't give promises.

Unpacking was a process, one that pregnancy only made more annoying, but Maddie tried to be proactive about it, spending most of her days off going through boxes and figuring out ways to combine her things with Chimney's. They both had a lot of kitchen gear, and there had been some compromises. Buck had been delighted to end up with some (almost) new cutlery and skillets.

Maddie woke up late one saturday morning, and Chimney had already left; he'd woken her up to say goodbye at 5 a.m. and she'd dozed off again. She lay in bed for a moment, stretching, dozing, contemplating, and finally decided to tackle their bedroom boxes. Those had taken her the longest, since she'd wanted to get the kitchen and living room straightened first. The sooner she got their bedroom in order, the sooner they could get the nursery done.

She still wasn't fully used to waking up next to Chimney every morning. Every morning she almost felt like it was a dream when he kissed her goodbye if he had an early shift, or kissed her awake on the rare occasion that they got to sleep in together. It felt too good to be true, it was like she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

She pushed aside all doubting thoughts, grateful that Chimney had finished putting together all of their new furniture on his day off. She had no doubt it had been a long day for him, and she gratefully settled into their new rocking chair, picking up on the boxes from his apartment. She expected just clothes, and knew that he didn't expect her to unpack any of his things, but she wanted to help him out. He was so opposite from Doug, he didn't expect anything of her.

She opened the box, taking out a few sweaters and carefully placing them on hangers.

And then she saw it. A tiny box, velvet covered.

Her first thought was that it was the ring he'd bought for Tatiana, but she remembered him telling her about giving that away.

Her second thought was wondering just how long he'd had it; did he just purchase it?

Her mind was swirling, and she tried to be rational. It could just be a set of earrings. Yes, that was it. She shouldn't open it.

She reached for the box, popping it open, knowing that her anxiety wouldn't allow her any sort of rest until she knew. She pressed her hand to her mouth, wanting to cry. It was a ring. It was fucking gorgeous, diamonds offset by pearls. Smaller than the ring Doug had given, but in all the best ways. When they'd first married, they'd been starting out and she'd worn her grandmother's ring. He'd given her an ugly, statement ring on their fifth anniversary, a huge diamond that was nothing more than a brag.

This ring was the complete opposite, this ring felt custom designed. Maddie almost wanted to check for an inscription; she knew that there would be something sweet there, but she didn't dare check.

She dropped the velvet box back in, taking the sweaters off of their hangers and hurriedly folding them again. Chimney couldn't know that she'd found it.

* * *

She spent the whole day worrying about it, wondering what it meant. She knew she should be excited, and one part of her was, but the other parts were only responding in panic. She wasn't ready for marriage. Marriage held too many memories of Doug, images of what marriage had meant when she'd been his wife. Marriage meant pretending, marriage meant lying, marriage meant shouting and anger and tears.

She knew that it wouldn't be the same with Chimney, she did. But seeing that ring made bile rise in her throat, whether she wanted it to or not. She was terrified.

When she walked into work that night, since she'd picked up Linda's shift to give her coworker a date night, Josh was waiting with a green tea.

"How's the baby?" He asked, walking with her into the break room.

"They're good," she said, storing her lunch bag in the fridge, and before she could help herself, the words came tumbling out. "I found a ring, Josh."

"Whoa," he said, holding his hands up. "Back up. I thought you guys talked about it, I thought he knew you weren't ready."

"I thought we did too," Maddie said, voice panicky even though she didn't want it to be. "I...love Chimney. I really do. I have problems saying that word, and I have problems with the idea of marriage. It just doesn't mean what it should to me."

"Don't feel bad about that, first of all," Josh said, leaning on the counter. "You have scars others don't. It's okay to feel like this."

Maddie shook her head, tears in her eyes. "I feel like I don't...I feel like I'm a terrible person because of how much this scares me. I know that Chim isn't...him. I know that. But that doesn't make this easier."

"Maddie, you lived almost two decades with Doug," Josh said softly. "It's going to take a lot more time before you've healed. In the meantime, know that Chimney won't ask you for anything before you're ready."

Somehow, that wasn't as comforting as it should have been. It almost felt like a betrayal, like he'd just gone out and bought a ring despite her telling him she wasn't ready for that by any meaning of the word. And she hated herself for feeling like that.

She needed to see her therapist. This wasn't easy for her, and it was only going to stress her out more.

* * *

She made it two days before she finally texted Hen. Hen called her back, and then promised to come over when her shift was done.

Hen and Maddie didn't talk one-on-one very often. They were kept updated on each others' lives through Chimney, and they always say each other at team gatherings, but their circles didn't overlap that often. They were both so busy, and Chimney usually hung out with Hen when Karen and Maddie were unavailable.

So this was unusual, to say the least.

Maddie opened the door for Hen, a nervous smile on her face. "Hey," she greeted. "Thanks for coming, I know I was weird on the phone."

"It sounded like an urgent situation," Hen said, voice amused.

"Do you want something to drink?" Maddie hedged, and Hen shook her head.

"I just came to talk, since you sounded worried," Hen said. "I told Karen why I'm running late, but I can't stay too long."

Maddie felt rushed now, which only increased her anxiety. "Okay, so, I wanted to lead into this but I'm just going to spit it out. I found a ring, in Chimney's things."

Hen's face softened. "Oh, Maddie."

"And I...love Chimney," Maddie said, struggling past the word. "You know I do, that's not a question. I am happy to commit to him, to this relationship."

"But you've got scars regarding marriage," Hen finished. "I get it. You're spiraling, and I would too, in your place."

Maddie could hardly speak. "I just need to know how long he's had it," she said softly. "Is he planning on asking soon? Because of the baby?"

Hen shook her head. "Maddie, he's not asking you because of the baby," she corrected. "This is because he adores you."

"Hen," Maddie pleaded.

"He's not going to ask you before you're ready," Hen assured her. "I mean that. Without betraying confidence, we've talked about this a few times, and he's so willing to wait for you. But because you're spiraling so hard, I will let you know he's had this ring a long time. He's been sitting on it since almost since you guys got back together. I don't think it's supposed to pressure you, it's just there for when you're ready, and he's ready."

"Okay," Maddie said. "Thank you, really, Hen."

"You're fine," Hen said. "I'll see you later, have some tea and try to calm down."

"Yeah," Maddie said, and walked to the kitchen.

He'd had the ring for so much longer than she'd expected. Did that make this better or worse?

In the quiet of the evening, knowing that Chimney would be getting home soon, Maddie found her brain wandering. This time, it went to positives. He was waiting for her to be ready. He wasn't rushing her. He'd known he was sure about this relationship since they'd gotten back together, but that hadn't translated into making her feel pressure.

She felt tears come again, but they were good tears this time. She pressed a hand to her mouth, realizing how much she loved him, realizing that this wouldn't be anything like her previous marriage. Chimney had already rewritten every single piece of Maddie's life, and she lay a hand on her stomach, breathing in deeply.

Quiet. It was finally quiet. Her brain had settled.

* * *

She was waiting on the couch, a throw blanket over herself, when Chimney came in, carrying chinese, and an anxious look on his face.

They ate without much conversation, but she could tell that he knew something was off. "Are you doing okay?" He finally asked, after handing her an egg roll.

"Yeah," she said. "It was an emotional few days."

"Baby brain?" He asked gently, reaching for her hand, and she took it gratefully.

"No," she said. "I got some news that I wasn't ready for."

He carefully met her gaze. "Are you ready to talk about it?" He asked.

She set her plate on the coffee table, and Chimney followed suit, moving closer to her, and taking her other hand in his as well.

She looked at him, really looked at him. His eyes were tender, worried. He squeezed her hands comfortingly, and she smiled at him, leaning in for a brief kiss. He leaned his forehead against hers when she pulled away. "I love you," he whispered, and she kissed him again in lieu of the words.

"I've had a lot of time to think," she said when she'd pulled away. "And I can't say that I was comfortable with the idea at first, but I processed it."

He tilted his head, confused.

"I … love you," she said, the words a struggle. His eyes were so big right now. "You know that. I feel so moved by how much you love me, and I adore the way you smile, and your kindness, and a million other things. And I know that any step of our relationship will be completely different from what I previously experienced."

They didn't use his name, they didn't give Doug that power.

"Howie Han," she began. "I want to marry you. And I'm ready."

He was trying to speak, he couldn't find words, and she leaned in and kissed him, feeling tears on her cheeks. He was kissing her back, joyful and tearful, and then he pulled away. "I'll be right back," he said, and she smiled, as he ran to the bedroom. When he returned, his face was more serious.

"You found the ring, didn't you?" He asked, and she nodded. "Maddie, I'm sorry. I never wanted you to feel pressured-"

"No, no, that's not why," Maddie said. "Howie. I found the ring, and I admit that it made me spiral. But that's not why I said I want to marry you. I said it because I do."

"I bought this our first summer," he admitted, stepping closer. "I couldn't help myself. I was head over heels and I just did it. I wanted to be ready, in case. Hen laughed at me, but she also supported it since she knows how I felt about you then, how I feel about you now."

He went down on his knee, and Maddie pressed hands to her mouth, tears on her cheeks.

"I have loved you since the moment I laid eyes on you," Chimney said. "There was a part of my heart that saw you and knew that you were what I had been missing. Your gentleness, your kindness, your pure heart. I love that you're carrying my child, I can't believe the gift you are giving me, and I want to spend every moment of every day by your side."

"Howie," she said, barely able to talk.

"Will you marry me?" He asked, and she nodded fiercely, tears spilling over anew.

"Yes," she said, and the ring was on her finger, and then Chimney was next to her, gathering her into his arms, kissing every tear away.

His hands fell to her stomach. "Did you hear that?" He soothed, rubbing circles there. "Mommy just said yes."

"They kicked," Maddie exclaimed, feeling the pressure, guiding his hands to the spot. "Oh my god, Howie, that was their first kick."

"They're celebrating too," Chimney said, his eyes meeting hers. "Of course they are.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Breakawaysss on insta and I were talking about this, and what a proposal would look like, and if Maddie would be ready for that, and this just wrote itself. Hope y'all enjoyed. ~Meowser :) Love you, Audrey


End file.
